2) The media’s mixed message
Advertisers, movie makers and those who dress celebrities aren’t always in the spotlight, but they have a huge amount of influence on each of us and the world we live in. This is particularly true for our teenagers.
Powerful Image Makers
• TV and Film
Two of a parent’s biggest enemies are television and film. Is there anything that can keep your teenager away from food like the latest development in their favourite soap?
One of the big images TV and film create is about sex. In films and on TV sex is often amazing! Now don’t get us wrong – sex can be amazing – but there are also difficult times. First times can be painful, messy and pretty embarrassing; not often what you see on screen. In life how often are there silk sheets, warm rooms and a magical orchestra providing ambience from the wardrobe? One word: IMAGE!
• Magazines
Picture this: The girl on the front of the magazine is 6 feet tall, with perfect hair, and a stunning dress that shows off her long, slender legs and skinny frame to perfection.
Inside are shocking pictures of women who look like famine victims. Flat chests and lollipop heads balance on legs and arms that look like they might snap. “WAY TOO SKINNY!” screams the headline and you pity the celebs who have gone too far in a quest for perfection.
Yet on the next page is an article telling your teenager how they could lose two stone in days. They’re already imagining how they could have the perfect body at last, the images on the page before already forgotten.
The world our children live in is full of images; images that constantly send mixed messages. Magazines will tell them it’s bad to be too skinny, but then why include the stick-thin models and pages of fad-diets? Images seek to exploit and use us all, so we need to prepare our teenagers so they can handle the messages thrown at them.
The Power of AdvertisingLet’s explore the power of advertising – what else could make Ben Affleck appear less popular than an average-looking lift attendant? That’s the theme of the latest ‘Lynx Effect’ advert. As a result, when your son rushes down the stairs and out of the door; the only thing left is a lingering smell! Every teenager wants to be more popular, and the image makers want them to believe that a smell can do that. Spot the lie! It’s there for anyone to see, yet teenagers seem to fall for it every time. They desperately beg you for the latest must-have product, but what they want will be totally different in a week or a month.
By the time they are 70, the average person in the UK will have spent eight years of their life in front of the TV. That equates to hundreds of thousands of adverts watched, and even if you’re off getting a cup of tea, you could probably still pick out which product is being advertised straight away! Its not just television and film; the next time you are on your way to work try to count the adverts around you. The likelihood is that you’ll miss loads. They are everywhere: they sell miracle products and promise to make you ‘debt free’. As a parent your job is to dispel the myths and lies that adverts promote, and we are here to help you along the way.
Lie #1:
Buy this product and it will meet some deep need
What ever your teenager’s particular need is, I’m sure there is a product out there for them! Take the need for acceptance. We all want to be liked, to belong. Belonging to a group comes with a price, and for teenagers that can simply be the price of a pair of shoes. This is a massive pressure on your child.
The answer is not to go and buy the latest product so your teenager can belong: you would be bankrupt in a few months! You need to know this lie is out there. The pressure it creates won’t go away, but you can start sending the positive message to your teenager that no material object can meet this need.
Lie #2
Buy this product and you will look this good!
Let’s go back to our Ben Affleck/Lynx Effect advert. If you spray yourself, you will get smiled at and, to make it better, you’ll get more smiles per day than a Hollywood superstar. You can see that this scene is very far from the truth.
Why don’t clothes fit you when we go to the shops? It’s probably because the models that wear the clothes in the adverts have had them made especially for the occasion. The average model weighs 25% less than the normal person. As parents, you know these lies and can let them wash over you. However teenagers are aware of their body and comparing themselves to adverts only makes them feel like a failure.
Adverts are a part of daily life. They are something we see, hear and even experience. Adverts are not just on billboards or on television; they are on our radios and some people are even walking adverts. You’ll be hard-pushed to find a teenager who doesn’t know the top brands. A tab or label can make all the difference, not only to the price but also to the credibility of your teenager – well at least in other teenager’s eyes. Teaching your teenager to love themselves for who they are not who they feel like they should be or want to be is extremely important.How can we get the message straight?You can’t control everything your children see, hear and read but you can start to equip them to make their own mind up about the messages they’re bombarded with daily.Watch TV with your teenager, look through magazines with them. Help them to see that you don’t think these things are intrinsically ‘bad’, but that there is more to them than meets the eye. Encourage your children to search for hidden lies, meanings and values, and to question what they are being told instead of just accepting it. You probably already know that your teenager has a naturally questioning mind. The area of the media is one in which you can help them put it to good use! Try to release what is already there in your children, and watch them benefit.
